Yesterday I went to Ultimate Ice Cream to beat the heat....I had to wait in line forever....so while I waited I mentally gave people in line ice cream names based on my impression of them and what they ordered. I know, weird. But it killed time.
The girl in front of me had olive skin, long dark hair and an earth tone maxi dress....she was with a vertically challenged olive skin guy wearing a wife beater shirt and flip flops. She didn't look like she was breaking a sweat even though it was over a 100 degrees outside. One scoop chai with lemon berry syrup.....a little exotic and trendy. I had no "feel" for him but he ended up with maple bacon vanilla in a waffle cone.
Another girl was wearing 4 inch hot pink platform heels with white booty-brushing shorts and a hot pink tank top....overly processed hair....overly tanned.....over the top. Raspberry Chocolate with Marshmallow Fluff.
A girl wearing khaki capris..with a 3/4 length black gap sweater (100 degrees outside)...espadrille sandals...black glasses....book by Hemingway in hand....hair slicked back in a perfect pony tail....one scoop coffee.
Oddly enough my predictions were pretty much spot on......
And then there was me.......denim capris.....blue and pink converse tennis shoes with hot pink ribbon shoestrings....pink shirt...matching jewelry. Face blotchy from the heat and sun. Nose and allergies all to pieces. Hair frizzy and hard to handle. Yep, vanilla soy. Vanilla soy that I had to eat in enough time to make it home in exactly 20 minutes....or risk unseemly consequences.
Why can't I be the exotic chai or the sensible coffee or the flirty raspberry....
No.....I'm vanilla soy. Plain old boring vanilla (lactose intolerant and apparently soy intolerant) soy.
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