Groupon Addiction

It's official...I'm "outting" my mother.  Ever since she retired she has become addicted to Groupon, Asheville Deals, DealChick and any other online coupon source she can find.  At first it was innocent purchases.......a few restaurant gift certificates, something from the office supply store BUT now she's gone to far.  Now I'm monitoring her Groupon purchases.....it's either that or we are putting her in a home.

Several months ago I mentioned that I would love to have a hot stone massage.....so for Valentines Day....I got a Groupon for one.  She's been after me ever since to make the "appointment before the coupon expires".....by the way, that would be 2 years from now.  Anyway, last Friday I decided to make the appointment.  I called up the number.....I needed evening or weekend hours.  A very calm sounding lady answered the phone and started telling me the process.  We decided on this Sunday at 10......then she say (or so I thought) "how far away are you"...so I said 20 minutes.  She said...."you are 20 minutes away from giving birth".....ummmmm, no.  So I took this opportunity to ask the name of the spa.....Spa Materna....as in maternal, maternity, mother, birth, PREGNANT.  She asked when my baby was due....this is when I decided we needed to slow things down a bit.  I explained that my mother bought me the Groupon thinking it was for a regular hot stone massage.....by this point I had visited Spa Materna online and found out that I can have my fertility stimulated (let's don't), stopped (probably already has), my pregnancy can be assisted by a midwife or a doula (had to look that one up), it could help my post-partum depression....pretty much every issue I don't have.  Well the lady on the phone took it all in stride...gave me the directions and said it would be no problem.....I could have a normal massage....and leave with fertility intact.  So then I called the Groupon Goddess and asked her if she happened to notice the name of the spa.....she said "why, no".  I mentioned the name...and told her about it....she giggle hysterically and said "well, they didn't say they were for pregnant people".....my argument......the name SPA MATERNA. 

So Sunday at 10...me and my reproductive organs are going to get stimulated.......thanks Mom!!!